The manifestation of a deep seated childhood fear of abandonment..

2 10 2011

Morphing into adulthood

The seeds of fear flourish

The tension builds

Frustration intensifies

The fear is chasing me

The dark wispy shadow is following

It is catching up and grabbing a hold on me

Pulling me into its warped vision

A vision of life, people and myself

Anxiety escalates

Reinforcing the fear

Expulsion is always possible

Uncertainty creeping upon me

Wrapping myself with doubt

Igniting a passionate need to be wanted

Longing for stability

An ache penetrating deep within

A demand for security

Comfort in others sanctuary

Bang it has gone

Self destruction has taken a hold

It has slipped away

Or did I push it away

For what I desire

For what I crave

It begins again

This torment of my morbid nightmare

My path is set for self destruction

Set by childhood

By my fear

By a neglected human need

To love and for it to be reciprocated

To be safe and secure

The need to be happy…




One response

17 03 2018

It’s amazing how our childhood can affect us as adults. Mine still does sometimes.

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